Poetry Critical 2.0

Hey guys, Donald here.

In a few weeks, this site will be 9 years old. 9 years! And I still know some of the earliest submissions by heart.

But, boy. That’s like 102 in web-years. So it’s time for something new. I’m building that something now with my nights-and-weekend minutes (and plenty of coffee). Buy me a cup?

Development updates from Twitter:

Follow @poetrycritical for more!

Random Poem:

COFFEE
mikerembis
In all of my travels	1
In all I have seen	2
The key to tranquility lies in a bean	3
Not pinto or kidney	4
Not lima or green	5
But dark, rich and bitter	6
And dancing with cream	7
To be found in the streets, Cosmopolitans know	8
“It’s legal to brew!”	9
So they let the bean grow	10
And it’s picked, Oh so gently!	11
With hill climbers hands	12
And sent off to market to far away lands	13
Now everyone knows,	14
As the bean pickers do	15
That nothing is better than fresh home made brew	16
The beans must be picked	17
And same day be roasted	18
Or else you lose flavor	19
So pickers have boasted	20
The beans are then best when they’re crushed right away	21
And boiled in crystal clear water, THAT DAY!	22
It’s what captures the essence of dewdrops, they say	23
That wait with the beans as they ripen away	24
So as you sit idly	25
And look at your cup	26
Think of how much it took,	27
To fill up	28
Somebody climbed a mountain for you	29
And brought the beans home	30
And roasted them too!	31
And somebody took them	32
By land and by sea	33
In hundred pound bags,	34
Through customs, with fees!	35
So if you complain that the price is too much	36
I counter by saying	37
“You don’t pay enough”	38
And if you insist on engaging my clutch	39
I have a suggestion	40
“Then –	41
Don’t drink the stuff”	42
I’d rather pay more so that you may have less	43
I’d rather enjoy what I know while you guess	44
And if you should wonder	45
Why my feelings are such	46
I’ll now tell the story, Why I like it so much	47
On a cold winter day	48
As I sat all alone	49
Not a friend did come over	50
Not a friend did I phone	51
Not a morsel of food in the house could I find	52
But a few cubes of sugar and a tin full of grind	53
I studied the can and read the directions	54
And learned, Even I	55
Could now brew to perfection	56
I opened the tin	57
The aroma I savored	58
And wondered how I would enjoy such a flavor	59
I put on the water	60
It came to a boil	61
Then tossed in the grounds	62
And the water did roil	63
The brew churned and foamed,	64
Turned from brown into black	65
And from that very moment I knew I had the knack	66
I soon poured a mug	67
And so slowly it flowed	68
Like heavenly mud from the banks of the Ob’	69
I dropped in my sugar	70
And poured in my cream	71
And then watched them both	72
Dissolve in the steam	73
I started to wonder if this were a dream	74
And found this concoction,	75
Quite simply, Supreme	76
I then took a sip	77
And the taste was so bitter	78
And creamy! And sweet! All at once made me jitter	79
‘Twas like kissing my wife for the very first time	80
And for once in my life,	81
Having reason to rhyme!	82
I finished the mug	83
And although satisfied	84
I then poured a second	85
For I felt so alive	86
I had found a new friend and it came in a can	87
Like a Genie whose bottle	88
You find in the sand	89
I soon went to shops where the congregates drink	90
And share wistful stories	91
Or sit and just think	92
And learned from my friends	93
That there’s more, so much more	94
There are beans in the world	95
You can’t buy in a store	96
So packing my bags and my mug	97
For the road	98
I set out to find out	99
Which beans are not sold	100
In stores and in shops in my part of the earth	101
The beans that – So Precious!	102
They don’t know their worth	103
I traveled on foot to the land that lies South	104
Only to pleasure my craving,	105
My mouth	106
Yet in every shop	107
It seemed all I could find	108
Was imported, dry roasted Columbian grind	109
It all was quite tasty,	110
Yet something it lacked	111
That tingling sensation you get in your back	112
When you’ve just drawn the Ace from the top of the stack	113
And the look on your face that says	114
“I’m the one, Jack!”	115
To hillsides I climbed in Brazil and Peru	116
Just hoping to find	117
That one special brew	118
The one that would tell me	119
“I love you, too!”	120
I know it sounds crazy but what could I do?	121
A madman possessed	122
The stories repeated	123
In spite of the tales	124
I dared undefeated	125
To find the black bean that bleeds when it’s heated	126
With the essence of dewdrops	127
I move on, unimpeded	128
To every hill in the Andes I roamed	129
In every village and valley	130
I combed	131
Every camp, Every hut,	132
Every one I could find	133
Was drinking imported Columbian grind	134
“Enough is enough!”	135
I said with a laugh	136
“I’m going to Europe to see what they quaff”	137
Away I did go	138
On the ocean by ship	139
The porter then spoke	140
As we pulled from the slip	141
“Rare and exotic are blends you will find,	142
Our menu is best, and unmatched!	143
When you dine –	144
The choices from Kona to rich Danish drip	145
Are better than any you’ve had on your trip”	146
I tried every mocha libation they had	147
Every espresso	148
And found not one bad	149
Yet mug after mug	150
However I tried	151
I’d still found not one to be	152
Satisfied	153
In ten days and nights we took harbor again	154
I called to the porter	155
“I thank you, My Friend!	156
The beverage we’ve shared have been tasty indeed	157
But I’m off to find more”	158
And he bid me “Godspeed!”	159
I trekked to the Northernmost lands I could reach	160
Where they sweeten the drinks	161
With orange or peach	162
But the brew is so bland	163
For the beans are so old	164
I knew right away	165
It was South I should go	166
In Paris and Naples	167
They carry rich roasts	168
Waiters are quick to attend to their posts	169
But the beans are not special	170
Though the scent fills the air	171
It’s only dark roasted Columbian Fare!	172
I sailed the Aegean	173
Where the Turks and the Greeks	174
Serve the brew like it’s syrup	175
So I stayed there for weeks	176
But that something,	177
Was missing	178
And I soon ventured on	179
To Kenya and Congo	180
And lands far beyond	181
But the elephant brew,	182
As they call it down there	183
Was so strong and virile	184
I sprouted some hair!	185
And then I set out on the Indian sea	186
Where many an Island was waiting for me	187
These islands so lost and so rich and so green	188
I was certain that one,	189
ONLY ONE, had the bean	190
I stayed to the South on the edge of the land	191
And asked all the natives that I found on the sand	192
If the mountains had plants	193
That they serve into drink	194
And found that they didn’t	195
But that they had a link	196
To a land in the East where they trade off their fruits	197
For bags full of seeds	198
And boxes of roots	199
So they drew me a map	200
And they pointed “Out There!”	201
I abandoned the waves and I took to the air	202
My pilot was kind and he took me to Java	203
Where jungles are dense	204
And mountains belch lava	205
Where pelicans soar with the bats	206
And the trees	207
Have squirrels who fly without	208
Even a breeze	209
The flowers sprout wide	210
And as tall as a man	211
They’ve been growing here since	212
The day time began	213
And up in the hills I was told I should go	214
Where the rains never stop	215
And the big flowers grow	216
So I hiked and I plodded	217
Through mud filled with leeches	218
I scampered and scurried to the Easternmost reaches	219
Of the isle where the land fell away at my feet	220
And found myself cliff bound and	221
About to retreat	222
When a man with a mule	223
Hauling bags full of beans	224
Rounded the cliff with a boy in his teens	225
They were headed for market	226
To sell all their stock	227
But sold me a handful	228
Wrapped up in a sock	229
I roasted the beans right there on the cliff	230
And ground them myself with a rock	231
And a stiff	232
Piece of wood that I found on the hill up above	233
And soon brewed myself	234
A cup full of love	235
The brew was so bitter	236
And crudely unique	237
I knew it the moment it entered my cheek	238
The bean grew nearby,	239
But this was not the one	240
To the North! On a hill,	241
Where there’s even less sun	242
I knew I should go for I knew it was there	243
Only five hundred miles	244
But not by the air	245
For the land there remained untamed and uncharted	246
It was not for the weak	247
Or the feeble fainthearted	248
I went to the port to charter a boat	249
But NOBODY,	250
NOBODY dared take me afloat	251
“Upon Java Sea to Borneo land?”	252
A sailor spoke up, “Friend,	253
Please understand,	254
We just don’t go there	255
No matter the reason	256
Be the sky and sea blue or the stormiest season	257
Those who’ve attempted	258
Have never come back,	259
Except for that fella’ – Ol’ Captain Mack”	260
He pointed across to a man with no legs	261
“Look at the ghost – Now he sits and he begs!	262
He used to be mighty,	263
A commander was he	264
Of two hundred men	265
And a fleet of ships! Three!	266
But once in the waters of Borneo land	267
A thousand brown natives emerged from the sand	268
And swam and canoed and they boarded the ships	269
And cut all their throats	270
All but one –	271
All but his	272
They threw all the bodies one by one	273
To the deep	274
And the blood woke the sharks	275
From their nautical sleep	276
And they came and they ate	277
With their teeth sharp as knives,	278
Then made Cap’n Mack jump!	279
Made him swim for his life!	280
Two days he floated alone in the sea	281
Some fishermen found him, and thought,	282
‘Dead was he’	283
No one can say how the Captain survived	284
With legs ate by sharks,	285
He should have just died”	286
I went to the Captain	287
And told him my scheme	288
Expecting he’d tell me to give up the dream	289
But instead his eyes fired	290
And his voice was elated	291
He told me “It’s been seventeen years	292
That I’ve waited	293
To go back to Borneo and find the black bean	294
That lost me, me legs!	295
Along with my team!	296
And now one has found me	297
A soul such as I	298
Who’d risk life and limb	299
For a taste of the sky	300
I have here a map	301
Of the place that we seek,	302
A place that the natives call	303
Devil’s Hand Peak	304
It is lost in the bush only twelve miles in,	305
And the natives around it, They think it’s a sin	306
To set foot on it’s soil	307
And harvest the beans	308
So they’ve built giant fences around it, you see	309
Impenetrable,	310
Although it may be,	311
I’ve laid out a plan for a man	312
Such as Ye!	313
We’ll take to the air on a catapult sling	314
And slowly glide down on a giant cloth wing	315
Then we can pack all the beans that we need!”	316
“Yes, Cap’n Mack, but tell me –	317
How will we leave?”	318
He said not to worry	319
So we took to the sea	320
With Mack’s First Mate, Charlie	321
Our strength was now Three	322
Stealthy, at night	323
We arrived on the shore	324
With fog and no light	325
‘Twas like creeping a moor	326
Nobody saw as we crept our way in	327
Through the bogs and the muck	328
Before mornings begin’	329
And we came to a wall that was twenty feet high!	330
And beyond it,	331
The mountain that reached to the sky	332
The moss was like carpet	333
Heavy vines tumbled down	334
The light began sparkling on the dew all around	335
We then chose to climb	336
And abandon the sling	337
As we raced up the wall hearing little birds sing,	338
There were drumbeats and footfalls	339
Alight on the wind	340
And as soon as we crossed	341
We knew we were pinned	342
I stared back but once and it jangled my fears	343
There were ten thousand men there,	344
With ten thousand spears!	345
We had just gone a distance	346
That their aim would not reach	347
For the mountain’s forbidden	348
And the wall, They won’t breach	349
So we clambered and scrambled	350
And climbed up the side	351
Charlie took Mack on his back for the ride	352
And we soon found a basin	353
At eight thousand feet	354
Where the beans we found	355
Grew among fern and moss peat	356
With heather so beautiful	357
And roses so sweet	358
Dewdrops, So mystical,	359
I fell to my feet	360
The First Mate was speechless	361
And Mack took a seat	362
“Know this, My Mates,”	363
Old Mack said with a smile	364
“We’ve been the only folks here in a while	365
You can tell all your friends,	366
And the humble and meek	367
That you were the ones’	368
Conquered Devil’s Hand Peak!	369
And we gathered the beans	370
And our fingertips stained	371
With the essence of dewdrops	372
Our backs and necks craned	373
We then filled our sacks with all the beans we could find	374
Captain Mack roasted	375
And Charlie would grind	376
And we soon brewed a pot	377
From a glacier fed stream	378
By the time it had whistled	379
We felt so serene	380
And so calm and so peaceful for sharing the dream	381
Captain Mack had the sugar	382
And I had the cream	383
We then raised our mugs for a victory toast	384
From the cliff we could see out and over the coast	385
And I only had one	386
Single glorious sip	387
When the earth shook like mad	388
An explosion had ripped	389
The roof of the mountain	390
And ten miles high	391
The boulders and vapor and ash filled the sky	392
So we dropped all our beans	393
And I ran for the cliff	394
And Charlie sprang forward	395
Captain Mack in his grip	396
Charlie thought quick	397
And unfolded the kite	398
And Three jumped together	399
Holding on for dear life	400
Sailing down to the Ocean	401
With our faces of soot	402
I looked back but once	403
When I saw that our loot	404
Was encumbered by lava	405
And the rocks tumbled down	406
And buried the grove with a crash and the sound	407
Of Catastrophe wailed	408
And further and further and further we sailed	409
On the blast of wind dealt us by Devil’s Hand Peak	410
We were over the Ocean	411
And yet up a creek	412
The hang glider soared from the squealing volcano	413
Glancing at Mack	414
I saw the look of the pain of	415
A life of ambitions and dreams never granted	416
Before we had ditched,	417
The Captain recanted,	418
“Beware your obsessions,”	419
He told us “My friends,	420
We’ve chased our desires,	421
Now see how it ends!	422
The bean was much sweeter in our thoughts	423
‘fore we knew –	424
This day that we taste it,	425
The dreaded curse TRUE!	426
I should have heeded the warning that…	427
That…	428
LOST ME, ME LEGS!!!	429
Should have burned the damned map!	430
NOT AGAIN shall I beg!”	431
And then he let go	432
And he fell to the earth	433
In a blink of the eye	434
He was gone from the berth	435
I looked at Charlie	436
And he peered at me	437
We saw in each other	438
That loss set us free	439
We floated along on a burst of warm air	440
That carried us off	441
From the mountain of flare	442
And finally touched down to the salt of the sea	443
The impact killed Charlie	444
And left only me	445
I clung to the mast	446
Of the big giant kite	447
And drifted all day	448
And all through the night	449
Fortune beheld me and so I was saved	450
Some fishermen caught me	451
And spared me the grave	452
From the stern I could see crimson smoke to the West	453
That billowed from	454
Devil’s Hand Peak, And the best	455
Of the beans were now gone	456
They were all dead and gone	457
They were all gone but one that I held in my palm	458
“How could it be that I carried it here?”	459
The tiny black fruit	460
Of the drink I hold dear	461
And what can I do now with one,	462
Only one?	463
I held it and marveled in light of the sun	464
I pondered the sip that I had	465
‘fore the blast	466
There could be none better	467
So I made it my last	468
I carry the Devil’s Hand bean as a charm	469
In the fold of my pocket,	470
It keeps me from harm	471
So, when you sit idly and look at your cup	472
Think now, how much,	473
It took to fill up	474
Somebody climbed a mountain for you	475
And brought the beans home	476
And roasted them, too!	477
And when you’re at market	478
In time of reflection	479
I beg you to bypass the pre-ground selection,	480
And buy the whole beans,	481
And take them home, Do	482
For nothing is better	483
Than fresh home made brew	484
When telling this tale	485
I hope you may learn	486
Live for your life	487
Before it’s your turn	488
And if you must know	489
What’s happened to me	490
I’m now safe at home	491
And sipping my tea.	492
(comment on this poem)

poetry critical

online poetry workshop

Welcome!

Poetry Critical 2.0

Development updates from Twitter:

Follow @poetrycritical for more!

Random Poem: