poetry critical

online poetry workshop

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re: for the sake of our own  PollyReg  5 Jun 17 2:45AM Thread Closed

Cadmium makes a guest appearance with a trunk full of motorcycle helmets,

"One helmet per one stand alone poet, thank you."

re: for the sake of our own  PollyReg  5 Jun 17 4:53AM Thread Closed

"and being real with someone real is the only human goodness. you can do everything you want, except be. you can't be what you aren't. "

Sounds like what I say to my granddaughter.

"You can do everything you like at Nannies, unless it's something dangerous"

Obviously, of course, that's when she is doing something dangerous....

ie, in a position where she is about to be attacked by the pets

re: for the sake of our own  unknown  5 Jun 17 7:30AM Thread Closed

Not cool and how typically Mike to start this thread (which is really about his own ego and not much else) with a doctored comment.
If he'd been honest he would have included it all, which was...

"And it's not too smart to insult the poet either.
Your biggest failing, Mike has always been just that.
If you'd like PC to enjoy a resurgence why not apply your considerable intellect more wisely without being such an asshole for the sake of your own shit."

QED

re: for the sake of our own  cadmium  5 Jun 17 9:37AM Thread Closed

that part was so wimpy that I thought it would weaken your credibility. I'm in it for the writing, and it was just better writing  make you not seem like a clone. I don't mind your thinking I'm an asshole, but what you think isn't as important as the dialog on writing. you're not a fake, it's just that you're not a mature writer. it's good you post these confessions so that people can see ineffective writing, but nobody here would take you for more than an entitled loser with Internet.  if you did this crap in a collage or urban writers discussion, you'd be ignored. at least here I give you some attention in order to comment to the others on style and talent.

re: for the sake of our own  PollyReg  5 Jun 17 11:57AM Thread Closed

https://youtu.be/Y6EbB8Stse8

;-)

re: for the sake of our own  unknown  5 Jun 17 3:05PM Thread Closed

I know you're hurting Mike and you can't hide that fact but please stop attacking writers who post here.
It pisses everyone off and they leave.
How many over the years have done just that because of you.
Not understanding how to provide a crit without delivering a personal attack on the writer -- and at your age too -- you ought to be ashamed of yourself.
Even Trump could do better.
Give the site a break, man -- focus on the writing not your absurd assumptions about the writers.

re: for the sake of our own  cadmium  5 Jun 17 7:24PM Thread Closed

let's put it this way. you think a crit like 'damn good' is a crit, and i think that's inarticulate to the point that you can't possibly be affected by writing and poetry the way the rest of us are. particularly, if you're just using some rehab group writing therapy move to just make the writer feel good. there's happy face poetry sites all over the place for that move. now, as for insults, i've been insulted here for being too old, too young ( people can't read for style ), too queer, too straight. also, too academic, too ungrammatical, too dark, too superficial. all of which means that i'm probably writing in the way a good writer writes -- in any way i can, and often. this is a site full of very mean people. you yourself: what the hell are you doing focusing on me? -- don't you understand that writing an effective poetry isn't just sayin'?

i get very positive feedback on my reviews. even you've given me positive responses. you know that i read very carefully and that i know the history of poetry -- what it does and does not look like -- and that i have a lot of helpful moves for getting to the honest real WAY of saying a poem. i only want to get good writers here, people who read for more than story, so that we can have a real shared critique and i'll get to read what my own stuff is doing and not doing.

what are you using this writing workshop for? because, you're not using it to become a better writer... it's more like you're dead -- dull, whining writing about what someone didn't give you -- and collecting a posse of the other dead so you can be more dead.

re: for the sake of our own  cadmium  6 Jun 17 6:06AM Thread Closed

best thing is to use p.c. to get your piece edited down strong enough to submit to Poetry Magazine. that would make you live forever. you may be a poet because you're sensitive,  but it's only when you share it that you become conscious of what you wrote.

re: for the sake of our own  unknown  6 Jun 17 9:26AM Thread Closed

How is it a dusty mirage appears mildly amusing, a tad simplistic and as ugly as Hallmark all at the same time?
Editing I can do better than you because I have infinitely more experience in the real world.
But why dig your own grave so eagerly?
Don't tell me the handful of hangers on at PC is the audience you crave.
I'm afraid you're much too cleverly confused to be a poet, Mike -- but if you were the only tree in the desert, personally I'd never turn towards your shade.

re: for the sake of our own  cadmium  6 Jun 17 10:12AM Thread Closed

this is dumb, but prose is kind of worthless anyway. .

now you're getting creative. you're not conceptual yet, but you're stacking. like, what experience am I missing, that I can't edit your prose or verse? I can read, and you can't,  but that's only going to allow me to be you, and you're still a kid looking for a dad. I'm my own dad, if you dig.

imagine that i've lived three twenty year epochs. I be gone through twenty of infancy,  twenty of childhood and twenty of adult hood. now, for the Last eleven years I've gone through twenty years of maturity.  in fifteen years I'll be post mature,  like larry, and start over.

I've lied, cheated and loved. I've never killed a human, never owned a human. maybe you've got me on both. That'd be an experience,  but not mostly a poet thing, cause nobody's worth more than our inventions in words... not worth killing or controlling. what was it like watching your daughter get born, when her mother was on the point of dying, and you had to give up your little ism ego trips and just ask for a higher help? did you flake? what was it like for you to be mortally afraid every day of your four years in high school, cause you were queer in those ealy sixties?  what was it like to meet your dad for the first time when you were fifty-eight? and, didn't care, and didn't want anything but just to see what as what? how did it go beatng cancer when you eere in your mid-sixties? how did you feel when you crashed a car at speed, or loved a twenty-five year old straight guy and wouldn't seduce him because it be bad for him? what did you feel when you watched your daughter get born and she and her mother were fine and you felt beyond acid happy? how did you feel when you drowned for a minute in the Columbia when you were four, and all you can remember about it was the fuck you you felt to the people watching you get naked dried off? how dick you feel when you realized you knew what people were thinking, but that they lied and said you were wrong and you felt like a retard from seven until you were thirty. and, maybe you're just like them. a lying embarrassed sneaky person trying to win a one move game. this is all pretty stupid as prose, but it's a start in a dialog. what have you done except borrow other people's feelings?

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