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but you still stepped on the damned grasshopper - FOOM FOOM FOOM
alibi

1. the missing links remain missing
 1
 
 
One of the most fundamental beliefs of evolutionism is that man has evolved from beasts through time, chance and natural selection. Some insist that evolutionism does not teach preach that man evolved devolved from apes but rather from "ape-like" ancestors. Like, totally. This argument is specious spacious sporadically
 2
the presumed "hominid ancestors" of man would be classified
 3
and clarified
 4
men must always clarify
 5
and classify
 6
and conclude conclude conclude conclude conclude lewd
 7
 
 
An ape is defined as merely a tailess monkey.
 8
the ape was defined and boxed in
 9
caged like an animal
 10
it was an animal.
 11
it was caged
 12
 
 
the researching research deal dealing what a scheming deal indeed!
 13
VIRTUALLY every ANY OF THE PRESUMED presupposition assumption consumption assumption proposition revision
 14
assumption man evolved from apes from tapes from grapes from drapes
 15
she looked like her prom dress was cut out of the drapes and when her mother smiles, that gaping hole makes me want to smash a lamp in her face.
 16
 
 
observations are not allowed a priori
 17
priority coming first from the primordial
 18
she's swamped with work and love-sick like a heroin addict.
 19
 
 
(the study of human and "prehuman" teeth are fossils, the imprints of a society long since passed. the imprints made by the dentists of teeth at a certain point of time. are the teeth in the back of his that genderless, sexless being's head still the same as they were five hundred years ago? are not all teeth one? yes. that is the path to true spiritual enlightenment. the teeth are all one. Praise Allah.)
 20
 
 
paleoanthropology pales at plays on poles when polled extensively
 21
from ape to man and back again (just flip on the TV)
 22
transition transmission digression succession
 23
 
 
the missing links remain.
 24
missing links remain missing
 25
the missing linsk slinks and lyncs lynches the slinks the sphinx the sphynx the sick six slinks skins
 26
siiiiinks like a boat in water
 27
out of water.
 28
 
 
 
 
2. parable of the severed economic relationships
 29
 
 
through anecdotes and
 30
12s of scientific studies
 31
through mountain goats
 32
and demonstrations on stage
 33
where the triumphant man on the platform
 34
holds a head high above his head
 35
the crowd lets out a gasp and sigh
 36
the head's eyes bleed out pus
 37
black like the rest of us
 38
from mining for coal and slavery
 39
gone wrong
 40
when did it go right?
 41
the plague the plague the plague
 42
O! he cannot see! he has surely gone mad
 43
the dogs are all a'barking now
 44
furious with
 45
the scent of their master's blood
 46
the scent of their master's victim's blood
 47
the scent of their victim's blood
 48
 
 
and had a man lived
 49
with a dog and been good to it
 50
and petted it every day and fed it well
 51
he should come to the bridge
 52
at the end of his life
 53
and the gods cry out
 54
HAS THIS MAN BEEN GOOD?
 55
and the dogs howl comes from across the chasm
 56
clearly calling in reply:
 57
Yes! Yes! My master has been loyal to me
 58
has fed me and clothed me and bathed me and
 59
taken all the required precautions
 60
he was a good master. one of the best masters i had, and i am glad to have taken him in.
 61
And the gods should reply:
 62
SO BE IT.
 63
 
 
but if the master had beaten and bewildered
 64
their dog with clubs and sticks
 65
and left it out in the cold to die
 66
so that the next morning thoughtless, stagnant icicles had formed on its snout stout nose
 67
then there would be room when the time came to ask
 68
HAS THIS MAN BEEN GOOD?
 69
to shout across the abyss in reply:
 70
No! No!
 71
he has struck me with his stick
 72
and left me in the cold to rot and die
 73
there are no words of praise which i may return, for i received none in my life.
 74
 
 
and the bridge would fall.
 75
 
 
London bridge is falling down
 76
falling down
 77
falling down
 78
La la la la la la la la la london bridge
 79
Ho ho ho ho hummmmm!
 80
Ho ho ho merry
 81
Ho ho ho humbug
 82
Ho ho ho ho ho hoe hoe get the
 83
rake and hoe
 84
and a shovel full of earth
 85
and change the world
 86
 
 
through anecdotes
 87
and scientific
 88
12s of goats.
 89
 
 
 
 
3. riche
 90
 
 
sitting in the cafteria with my not so good lunch i look over the right shoulder to see my friend eating his great lunch with his chocolate bar for his dessert and i ask myself if i should ask him for a piece or if i should try to find some money that would procure me a chocolate bar and i finally get the courage to ask him for a chocolate bar but should i ask him for the chocolate bar? i don't know if it is a good idea to ask for the chocolate bar because he has it and i don't and i don't want to seem like i don't have the chocolate bar because if he knows that he has the chocolate bar and i don't have the chocolate bar well...
 91
 
 
he gives me a miniature size piece of the bar as i lean back in my chair and finish the great snack i look over to see if he has any left he doesn't and this is the power of property and ownership and
 92
 
 
Montezuma had it right, chocolate has the power to seduce us all
 93
the homegrown aprhodisiac
 94
drank chocolate all day long to enhance his libido
 95
 
 
chocolate shavings
 96
finely chopped nuts
 97
cocoa powder
 98
2.2 pounds semi-sweet chocolate
 99
Grand Marnier cognac champagne
 100
6.5 oz unsalted butter
 101
2 cups of whipping cream
 102
 
 
Combine the cream and butter in a saucepan
 103
melt like words of melting words and melt the melt the mellt the melllt the melllllt the
 104
mellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllt
 105
 
 
out of the frying pan and into the...
 106
chocolate in a double boiler
 107
stir FLIP STIR stir FLIP stir STIR STIR flip
 108
whisk SHOP SHOP SHOP SHOP
 109
ganache mixture with a liquer
 110
pour into pan
 111
this thick |
 112
the empty holes of a melon
 113
quickly scooped out by metallic ringing singing swinging
 114
 
 
chill.
 115
like ice cubes
 116
like lazy teens on a hot and sunny day
 117
in the summer sun
 118
in the sun fun fun in the sun under the
 119
son.
 120
 
 
ALL OF US ARE BAD PASTES
 121
 
 
cookie cutter the peop-... chocolate
 122
with scissors
 123
scissoring open your intestines
 124
so they spill on the floor
 125
the last duchess on the wall
 126
the last unicorn heaving its last breath
 127
before its legs give way-
 128
its horn driven to break a woman's virginity
 129
and sliced off by her sometimes-husband
 130
who is now rather blue.
 131
the last emperor
 132
his court and men all gone, trying desperately to reclaim his power, but knowing he stands no chance.
 133
 
 
chocolate IS A DYING ART
 134
 
 
 
 
4. not so fast!
 135
 
 
in the year 1621
 136
the pilgrims held their first thanksgiving feast
 137
they invited the great Indian chief Massasoit
 138
who brought ninety of his brave slave Indians
 139
and a great abundance of fools foods fools food
 140
 
 
Elder William Brewster, a minister, said a prayer that went something like this:
 141
 
 
We thank AMIDABA
 142
i am sorry to take your life away
 143
 
 
myoho renge kyo
 144
ho ben pon dai ni
 145
ni ji se son
 146
ju san mai
 147
an jo ni ki
 148
go shari hotsu
 149
sho bu' chi e
 150
jin jin mu ryo
 151
go chi e mon
 152
nange nan nyu
 153
is sai sho mon
 154
hyaku shi butsu
 155
sho fu no chi
 156
sho i shae ga
 157
butsu zo shin gon
 158
hyaku sen man noku
 159
mu shu sho butsu
 160
jin gyo sho butsu
 161
mu ryo do ho
 162
yu myo sho jin
 163
my sho fu mon
 164
 
 
(... skillful ways there the world honored one quietly came up... and said to Shariputra: the wisdom... is profound and cannot be measured, its gate is hard to understand and difficult to enter... No self-taught... can understand it. Why is that? (because!) the... attend on many hundreds of thousand of billions of past... and practiced the many teachings of those... bravely and energetically to their far-flung fame till they attained the profound law).
 165
 
 
i am sorry to take your life away
 166
BUT YOU STILL STEPPED ON THE DAMNED GRASSHOPPER.
 167
i am sorry to take your life away
 168
for our homes and our food and our safety in a new land
 169
i am sorry to take your life away
 170
we thank Amidaba for the opportunity to create a new world for freedom and justice
 171
i am sorry to take your life away
 172
 
 
AMEN
 173
 
 
i am sorry to take your life away
 174
 
 
 
 
5. non-existence
 175
 
 
ink ognito
 176
dripping down black
 177
and oozing from the swamps
 178
of the neverland of the men of the land
 179
of the nevermen
 180
who never went and never saw
 181
who never bowed and never prayed
 182
who never felt and never cried
 183
who never never never never never never
 184
got home
 185
 
 
were they never men?
 186
they were nevermen
 187
 
 
they will never be women
 188
they will never be forgotten
 189
they never listen
 190
they will never win
 191
they will never lose
 192
never be satified
 193
never.never.never
 194
 
 
they never were
 195
they are the people who never were
 196
they were invented
 197
they never was
 198
they had family, finance, service record
 199
fictitious personas
 200
they never was
 201
and they saved thousands
 202
of lives who WERE
 203
 
 
NEVER WERE MEN SO BRAVE
 204
never men were so brave
 205
some men will never forget
 206
 
 
men who can dream of things which never were
 207
who, in their sleep, will be drowned with dreams
 208
of shadowy images overshadowing foreshadowing looming over their dreams
 209
most terrible and smooth
 210
like a baby's navel
 211
dreams like mist and smoke and fog and
 212
dreams that devour everything
 213
in grays and blacks
 214
all swirling above in a thunderstorm
 215
of dreams
 216
 
 
dreams that never were
 217
belonging to men who never owned them
 218
and men that never were
 219
with dreams that they were.
 220
 
 
 
 
6. angels on the golf course
 221
 
 
he calculated the scores and decided
 222
he was running out of prizes
 223
while walking to the car he scored
 224
realizing they were different sizes.
 225
 
 
     he miscalculated and went back to collect
 226
     he said surely it was an angel's shriek
 227
     which crept along his mind, and
 228
     to the score card just give one more peek.
 229
 
 
there are feathers on the golf course
 230
all white and pure as paper sheets unscathed,
 231
they've ventured to the mortal realm momentarily
 232
and many obstacles they've braved.
 233
 
 
     and the devil is a'weeping
 234
     in his shallow dark black tomb
 235
     hoping there'll be more bad
 236
     when he rips hope from its womb.
 237
 
 
Archangel Michael, he swings back his club,
 238
driving it with intense force
 239
aiming at the hellish bad luck's source
 240
metaphysically off the golf course.
 241
 
 
     his shield formed of hope
 242
     and his sword handle of pure gold
 243
     there's angels on the golf course,
 244
     or so i'm often told.
 245
 
 
 
 
8. solar etchings in the sky
 246
 
 
one hundred and sixty two anorexic girls
 247
lining up like arithmetic on the lawn
 248
each one a picket as thick as their arm
 249
but still, they're barely able to lift
 250
the skull crossbones and Atkins
 251
that hovers over their souls.
 252
 
 
they've tried it all,
 253
they ate McDonalds every day
 254
bathed in tubs of lard
 255
they forced themselves to digest
 256
a thousand cups of tea
 257
but they only urinated sugar
 258
for three weeks.
 259
 
 
they pitter pat out the door
 260
all wearing identical yellow raincoats
 261
all black lipped from biting
 262
and ruby eyed from blood rising to their brains
 263
from standing upside down so long
 264
trying to digest bananas.
 265
 
 
FOOM FOOM FOOM
 266
their umbrellas open in the rain
 267
each one prickling up like a big black cactus
 268
a crown floating above their heads
 269
a halo of dark feathers
 270
a balloon of nothing
 271
 
 
flying to the sky
 272
until even the startled cry
 273
 
 
is gone
 274
gone
 275
gone
 276
...
 277
 
 
like the wind in the alcove
 278
whistling through the forest grave
 279
unable to remember
 280
the advice their old man gave.
 281
 
 
sad are the dolphins
 282
who mourn but with no tears to cry
 283
the world echoes back one request:
 284
I want to die. I want to die. I want to die.
 285
 
 
solar etchings in the sky
 286
and not a single bird to cry.
 287
 
 
the farmer's hands all dirty
 288
with life
 289
rest at the old man's side
 290
returning.
 291
 
 
he aches
 292
and shakes
 293
 
 
we all stand alone.
 294
 
 
she wrote her prophecies on leaves
 295
they were scattered by the winds and never read.
 296

an attempt to imitate the styles of others on this site.

part 7 is called "the missing link" by the way, its exclusion is for obvious reasons.

3 Dec 04

Rated 6 (6.1) by 8 users.
Active (8): 2, 3
Inactive (21): 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 4, 7, 9, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10

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Comments:

My dearest, you have overplayed your hand on this one. I know who you are.
-wendz
 — unknown

all smiles.
 — akiikii

wendz, what the hell are you talking about?
are you on crack or something?
 — alibi

"an alibi is all I am" or something like that, I can't remember totally completely correctly. Crack? My arm is.
-wendz
 — unknown

this is by far , the worst poem ive ever read
 — unknown

screw you, unknown
you wouldn't know a good poem if you woke up and it slapped you across the face.
 — Inuki

Aye, unknown. That was totally unnecessary and uncalled for. On this particular poem, I agree with Inuki 100%.
 — wendz

Inuki and Wendz, thanks for trying to defend me,
but I don't need your help. unknowns are stupid, especially when it's emo pretending to be someone else.
 — alibi

this poem fucking sux GAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 — unknown

wow. how lame, unknown.
any real comments on this?
 — alibi

i kept wanting to skip ahead, to get to the end ... it's so damn long
and i didn't ... i kept reading every line (but for Massasoit's prayer: i don't speak a damn word) ... i mean i just kept reading. couldn't stop. passed bedtime, passed cool-down time before the eyes close, and i just kept reading.
there's no way i feel qualified to critique this as a whole...too good, too large, too much to comprehend ... but i know i like every word that i read (aforementioned prayer aside, as i still don't speak that language)
all i can do is come back again ... and again
and hope one day the missing link is found
 — Bloodfetish

7 was my favorite.

hahahahaha! it was a jooooke!

erm. sorry. i need to print this one off.

*printprintprint*
 — noodleman

Geeze that was long
 — aeturnus

You know, I am going to go print this off and read it properly too. It's rather amusing. When I buy new ink, that is. Don't hold your breath. ^_-
-wendz
 — unknown

*heh*
knew it was a joke ... got ya, nm

--bf
 — unknown

If anything, this has expanded your horizons as an individual poet. You inspire me!
 — OKcomputer

First three I was trying to decide whether you were joking or crazy, but I suppose thats just how poets are. You have quite a knack for frenzied words, stream of conscience. 5 and 8 were by far my favorites.
 — Cloudless

Oh wow, this is so long, I first started to skim it cause it was so gosh darn long, but then I think I read five so I started to read the whole thing, You should be at top pretty soon (10)
 — Lilac

i hate to be the dissenting voice here, but i've been through this a couple of times now and i think this wants for a great deal of tightening. much attention needs to be paid to internal structure. as much as has been paid on the macro scale.

perhaps i simply don't like the styles imitated, or the imitation thereof, or lord knows what, but the thread wove through is too frayed for my taste.

i agree with wendz, although i am sure i attach different meaning to the words--both hers and yours.
 — noodleman

wow... really good!!
I think i might be missing out on the whole point because i don't understand how 7 fits or how people woud know that!

i'm really tired and i'll re-read it tomorrow!!

i really enjoyed it :)
 — SojT

"does not teach preach that man evolved devolved from apes but rather from "ape-like" ancestors. Like, totally. This argument is specious spacious sporadically"

roflmao.. ah. too funny. i didn't make it through the whole thing but perhaps I will later. hehe
 — unknown

alskdfj
 — unknown

Ten ten ten ten ten ten ten.  Brilliance, genius.  Last stanza, first poem, I read it many times.  Fourth stanza, last poem, I read it once.  They are my favorite parts.
 — megabyte

I'm not sure if I'm seeing what I think I'm seeing, but if it walks like a duck and it looks like a duck it's probably irony. The joke, if that's what it is, is actually a beautiful piece of work - if I were you, I would kill myself (or whoever else is handy). Wonderful.

:-)
 — rattlesnakes

I'm surprised anyone was bored enough to read 296 lines of rambling garbage.
 — ramher

Ambitious...I want to love this and I'm settling on like. Nice job but god almighty, my peepers-jeepers hurt. (and I only read half of it) I will resume the latter half at another sitting but now my bladders full....
 — BlueRock

post-script: love the title
 — BlueRock

Too long
 — larrylark

LarRY!
 — OKcomputer

holy hell this is freakin long!!
 — unknown

UnKNOWN!
 — OKcomputer

Mediocre.
 — unknown

One of the most boring and dragged out, repetitive poems I've ever read and my favorite of all time is Thanatopsis.
 — Isabelle5

So much promise, but thick with useless phrases
 — unknown

This is tiresome.
 — unknown

mmm. :)
 — bloodytearsx

It's a nice poetic essay, and the humor is great, but I sometimes wonder how things like this make the top rated list on a poetry website, when there are so many poems deserving this spot that go unnoticed.
 — unknown

I guess this would label me as un-intellectual or something of that sort? but this is tooooo looooong. sorry. couldn't finish reading it.
 — nickiblitz

Hehe, I like the humor on this. I don't really like the repitition that much but that's okay. I liked lines 166-174 and the 5th and 6th parts of the poem. Great job!
 — lonelygirl

fuck. what a piece.

v.
 — unknown

yeh have to agree - though there is much ehre to read - there isnt an awful lot in these pieces

pretty turgid stuff
 — Mongrol

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