poetry critical

online poetry workshop



Twenty-five Stories in Defeat
Resonanz

The sounds of footsteps on concrete,
 1
exactly twenty-four past three.
 2
The silence of conversations left incomplete,
 3
precisely the reason my eyes fall
 4
twenty-five stories in defeat.
 5
 
 
My slowly-uttered, porcelain words
 6
fall and shatter on cement.
 7
You don't help matters.
 8
I could do without
 9
your constant gavel beating.
 10
I'm not sure when I fell face first
 11
into the defendant's seat.
 12
 
 
And I could just as easily
 13
hold back these lukewarm tears today.
 14
But they'd levitate through the cracks
 15
in the sidewalk anyway.
 16
Instead let them fall dissonantly
 17
like your fists
 18
on piano keys.
 19
 
 
What feels like seconds
 20
into my second chance,
 21
you've so graciously granted,
 22
I'm bleeding
 23
for you a simple confession.
 24
Our parade has turned left,
 25
right into a funeral procession.
 26
It's no more
 27
than a simple blood clot.
 28
 
 
I've come to realize
 29
that your arm is not on my shoulder
 30
nor are tears in my eyes.
 31
No, this is your hand holding
 32
my head under water.
 33
With ripples and sighs
 34
this finale's notes will rise
 35
twenty-five measures,
 36
slammed doors, and dial tones.
 37
A conductor's hand raised,
 38
and my lungs gasping for air.
 39
 
 
The sounds of footsteps on concrete,
 40
but this time faster paced.
 41
The silence of my screams,
 42
"Salutations,
 43
adios,
 44
without further adieux
 45
Auf niesehen."
 46

Line 46 - Auf niesehen is a play on words.  "Auf wiedersehen" is the German expression for parting as you probably are familiar with, roughly translated to English it would probably be "Until I see you again."  "Wieder" means again.  However I insterted "nie" instead, which means never.  

3 Apr 05

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Comments:

This is good. Even the bits that stray into well chartered territory are saved. I like it.
 — ka

Thanks for the compliment.  I'm glad you liked it.
 — Resonanz

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hongjunming2018.4.24
 — unknown

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 — yangpeng

20185.31huangliyue
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20185.31huangliyue
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yaoxuemei20180712
 — yaoxuemei

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