poetry critical

online poetry workshop



effortless
jade

there should be a button to push to
 1
   make me spit out beautiful words
 2
except that the effortless is rarely art.
 3
        - written in 17 seconds.
 4

20 Mar 02

Rated 7 (6.7) by 2 users.
Active (2): 8
Inactive (13): 1, 4, 5, 6, 6, 6, 7, 7, 7, 7, 7, 7, 10, 10

(define the words in this poem)
(9 more poems by this author)

(3 users consider this poem a favorite)



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Comments:

17 seconds is a short time in poetics.
 — unknown

perhaps you've missed the point?
 — unknown

HAHA, I REALLY liked this. Very refreahing after reading a bunch of poems that are too uptight, sensical/non-sensical, or too intense. Good job. I grasped the point very well. Anyone who can't, doesn't have an remains of a brain, let alone a valuable one.
 — Bella

seriously. what's with low ratings and no comments?
 — jade

I'm wondering that myself. There seems to be a string of those coming through... I'm guessing it's probably just one person -- but what's his/her motivation for rating so carelessly?
 — rafter

These kind of poems do annoy some poeple. If one is feeling particularly tetchy then the punchline could be interpreted as this poem took 17 seconds to type out but gawd knows and who effing cares how long this banal bit of diddle took to think up. A grand excuse for giving it a thundering 'one'. {Not guilty, yer honor! :) }
 — unknown

that was certainly the punchline. other wise you're right, who would ever care how long it took? if it weren't the punchline, why in the world bother to write it?
 — jade

yet the effortless is constantly noticed. [this caught my eye so easily]
 — xout

i think your button has been pushed...

i think i need a button like that.

i love this...though i am more in love with "icarus"
 — tinkerbell

I love this one.
 — quinn

Fascinating. Are you jaded? A typewriter. A large, soaring bird...Defacing once again the seemingly answerless question of what is art? Cheer up. Most of the time, the work is worth it. There's a lot of work that goes into seeming effortlessness. The button exists. It's fate.
 — C

the effortless is rarely art? or is too much effort mere pretension. is art seeing or creating? both or neither? quitte provocative, well done.
 — joshodile

i dont know. this doesnt do it for me. it falls into my 'not a poem' category. its not bad writing, but... eh. i refrain from rating.
 — thinknerd

ha ha ha what such nonsence how can make a poem in under 17 secs no one can do a poem under seventeen secs
 — unknown

I also refrain from rating. Not a poem.
 — unknown

Jade - I liked this. I also liked the comments, as diverse as they were. This poem inspired me to test the logic behind it. I remembered something my ex once said to me and decided to 'build' a poem around that one sentence. It took me a little bit more than 17 seconds but not much. I'll let you know if what some people perceive as 'art' is effortless when more comments come in. Good work - good thought. -Sam
 — unknown

i love you for writing this.
 — unknown

stupid
 — unknown

Damn, that's good. Either that or I'm bushed.
-z
 — zepplin42

*laughs* Perhaps "beautiful" is not the word to use. Apart from that, totally cool.
-wendz
 — unknown

^_-
Would anyone believe that I randomed this twice within the span of twelve hours odd? It's a sign..this must be read!
-wendz
 — unknown

I agree with thinknerd
 — unknown

not bad
 — unknown

but
the effortless
is often art
is it not?
 — noodleman

If your self esteem is so low that you have to time your poems in order to make people give you leeway upon rating/critiquing, then you should try coloring books opposed to poetry.
 — ramher

obviously, ramher, that was not the point at all.
 — jade

I DIG IT
 — thematrix

Pretty good, I like the punchline
Capitalise the first word,
comma or semi colon after words at the end of line 2.
You don't need the full stop after art as you have a -.
 — marieF

YES!  I am still here, Holmes... hit me up at the ole hotmail account.  (see my profile for the addy)
 — aforbing

Rain
 — unknown

Crawling through the  3
mud,
 — unknown

there is no easy button except in commercials.
 — unknown

Staples sells an Easy Button - it's $4.75
 — Bombazine

you're one arrogant man. i agree with ramher
 — bohemian

It can be sometimes. Its best to always leave some spontaneity, it can easily get written out.
 — larrylark

Who is brady? I have never plagiarized a thing. This poem isn't even good enough to steal, so I can't imagine why you would accuse me of doing that.
 — jade

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 — unknown

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