poetry critical

online poetry workshop


they walk on bye
they stare at nothing
they laugh with eachother
they torment your dreams
they make you ache for them
they feel everything just enough
they are soft as flowers
they come with small print

23 Aug 03

Rated 5 (5.2) by 1 users.
Active (1):
Inactive (7): 4, 4, 4, 5, 5, 6, 7, 10

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(15 more poems by this author)

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Concise. Good double entendre with 'bye'. Interesting perspectives in your descriptive, very traditional.
 — RSpiers1

I agree with RSpiers, that is cool about the word bye in the first sentence. I totally agree with this poem too. Girls do all these things. Especially for me line four. That happens all the time for me. Line eight is great.~Chris King 10/10
 — FrChris

nicely done. this poem is so true. very concise and to the point. the last line is great!
 — Mazzo

like omg this site sucks ass
 — unknown

I dont like lines 6 and 7.
 — TrueToIt

 — Brandxxx

the last line would be better as "fine" sprint, instead of small.
 — unknown