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winter passing
jeffkurfess

love, she said
 1
is fragile,
 2
 
 
and a chore
 3
to keep alive.
 4
 
 
I paused a bit
 5
to ponder
 6
 
 
as I thought of
 7
past goodbyes.
 8
 
 
slowly then
 9
I offered
 10
 
 
as I drew
 11
a frosty sigh:
 12
 
 
that may be so,
 13
but this I know
 14
 
 
it comes to me to die.
 15

1 Jul 06

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Comments:

this is a lovely poem, minimalist and very evocative.  Lines 1-4 kept my attention and urged me to read onward.  A "chore" you say, and you might be right.  I like the grammacal construction in lines 9-12, two actions happening parallel ... a frosty sigh is an excellent image of love's fragile body ... not kept alive. I would only suggest one small change - in order to keep the 4 line structure of this work, might you consider making line 15 in two lines "it somes to me / to die."

Wonderful work, thank you for posting
Maria
 — slancho

Excellent poem
 — unknown

I love this.
 — jerotich

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