poetry critical

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blurry days

My insides it seems, want to escape,
They cannot take it,
This emotional rape.
Everything inside just wants to run away,
They cannot take it,
These blurry days.
Feel my pain, hear my smothered cry
Go on,
Bleed my blackened veins dry.
Tear them away, these dirty great fears,
Rip them away,
These salty crimson tears.
These broken words slip from my mouth,
Bleeding into the crisp air,
Heading south.
They echo in the deathly silence i created,
Tearing into,
These crippled facts i stated.
They rip, they tear, and they break into me,
Reminding me ok,
Is something i will never be.
And with razor blade in bloody hand, it all melts away,
Everything i've ever felt,
Bleeds away like night to day.

8 Jul 06

Rated 6.5 (6.7) by 2 users.
Active (2):
Inactive (1): 5, 7, 8

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not bad. this poem is bleeding with words.
but day comes back again. and again.
circle of fears.
(sounds like a harcore song lyric.)
 — Dead_soul

thanx, glad someone likes at least one of my poems! wooh go me!!!
 — razorkissed

I really like L2 - "emotional rape" =) keep writing
 — stolen_kiss

This is the poem of a cutter. Ahh such a dark space to write from; the only emergence of relief is when blood oozes.

You will be OK. Cutting is a desperate solution, however.
 — Kita

lol! i lyk line 2 aswell! "emotional rape" tis quit good if i say so myself! and yes cutting is desperate but that is wat i am  sometimes desperate to make it all stop without stopping everything xx
 — razorkissed

changed the layout! thought it looked better spaced out! what you think??
much luff <3 xx
 — razorkissed