poetry critical

online poetry workshop



Moai, Moai, Moai (FOTO Friday 3)
unknown

Three stone witnesses
 1
raised in acknowledgement,
 2
petrified and silent;
 3
 
 
immemorial captives
 4
raised in force and vigour
 5
by illustrious builder.
 6

http://tinyurl.com/lh6rk

4 Sep 06

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Comments:

Fails without the visual. 'Stone witnesses' says 'petrified and silent' for you, so you can minimalize futher. A few too many descriptives in such a short work.
 — unknown

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