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I was thinking along the lines of a better title, but the only thing that came to mind was the very cliched, "Like Father, Unlike Son," and that was just too corny for my tastes, so I kept it simple and straightforward.
dys poem functions for father
Title's perfectly fitting since you don't mention any names in the poem.
Short and bittersweet. I hope you have a great holiday Starr, dysfunction and all, hell it's part of the love ain't it??hahaha.
All the best,
Thanks, Jen! Yeah...dysfunction = love. I hope you have a great Christmashanukwanzakah too! Love, Starr
Hey! I thought that I would check out your poem. It's really good. I love your style, and the truth your poems shout out to readers. I can't agree with your poem more no matter how many times I say something, it seems like no one hears me. Your poem speaks so much truth about the holidays and families. I know for a fact my father never listens to me. Your an excellent writer with a gift.
I wish I could face it. My father has been diagnosed with Parkinson's and prostate cancer and I wish to be there in Maryland with him and Mom.
Hug your families tight, if you've got them.
Straightforwardly good with a timely reminder written after the poem.
Larry fat goose Lark
Wow, Bandrews...Thanks so much for that beautiful compliment you left earlier. 'Tis the season to be dysfunctional, huh? God bless you AND your writing. When you open your heart, the words just flow...Take care and thanks again. I appreciate it. Love, Starr
Poem for My Father
One is dead
and the other
pretends to live.
and the other
ever having known him.
Sorry, great poem, but it made me think of my father who I can't visit.
Awwwwwwwwwwww...I'm sorry, Fallen. I can relate though. That's why I wrote this. My father and I haven't bonded since I was 12 cuz he always called me "asshole" instead of by my name for much of my childhood life, so I started not liking him and then it turned to hating him and now that I'm older, I don't know what I feel anymore, but thanks for stopping by and you don't have to apologize for rewriting my poem. I understand. Hang in there.
Called you asshole, ouch! They didn't call me names but...
I would visit my dad once a year during the summer. His wife would take out a ledger and show me all that they had spent on me, I was a bill along with all the others. I knew how much I was worth because there was a total at the bottom of the page along side my name, it wasn't very much, and she complained it was too much.
Evil. I hope you know you're worth more than that ledger today, don't you? What a terrible story.
Hey starr this is such a good poem.
ill jus shut my ass and straightaway add this to my favorites.
Hey,Troch! LOL! You're so witty and funny! :-) I love my pic and I will always be thankful to ya for that! You're such a sweetheart, brotha. Thanks also for the compliment to this poem. You always make me feel like such a good writer! God Bless, my friend in poetry. Love, Starr
Yeah I understand fully man my dad used to beat me till I was about 13 i'm 16 now you are very talented
ever having been
Phoenix: This response is very remiss. I just got your comment on this. Thanks for not only your comment, but for your suggestion too, which I used. Peaceout. Starr
Now I really think this would a great poem, if you mentioned or at least alluded to what was said here. I don't think this is too bad starr. I think it needs a bit more though...something witty perhaps? Who are the two people being spoke of? Your mother and father? The mother listens and reminds him. And the father pretends to listen and forgets? These leaves things unanswered, but I think with a little clarification or an addition to this poem you could improve it a little bit. Not bad. 8/10
I think fallen may have some good ideas too.
Thanks, Henry. Nope. It's me and my father. Those are the two characters of this poem.
I changed the title of this poem to reflect who the characters are. As Henry pointed out, it was unclear. I see this now. Thanks, Henry. :-)
sorry about the story behind this piece, starr.
so much said in so little writ.
Thanks, Frac! Yep. Sad, but true. Although this was written about how he USED to be. He's actually gotten better over the years and so have I. :-)
thank you, Starr, for posting this for me :)
always loved it. xo
I love you, Jen! xo