poetry critical

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need wind
sun light
tight skin
old face
board ship
find land

29 Mar 07

Rated 9 (8) by 1 users.
Active (1): 9
Inactive (3): 6, 7, 10

(define the words in this poem)
(50 more poems by this author)

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must be about rats
 — unknown

I am just not understanding, Stout. I like the two two, two two, two two thing -
but the meaning of this poem is lost on me.

Maybe about pirates or possibly rats? (unknown I don't know how you got rats)


Explain? Elaborate?

 — unknown

Its about finding a new home.
 — unknown

What are you going for here?  It doesn't sound like slumber even slightly.  An old pirate, a person stuck on an island for years...
 — Isabelle5

not meant to sound like slumber. it is the recollection of a musing moment whilst in slumber. musing about Pedro Alavarez Cabral. so yes rats and pirates.
 — stout

Come on, Poet, you do not give enough information in this poem or Big Man for us to make sense of things.
 — Isabelle5

nice poem
 — varun

TS Eliot made it his general policy never to talk to people about the intentions of his poems, because he highly valued the subjective appraisal of art.

 — sir_I_clan

I do not want to appear unhelpful or arrogant (TS i am not), but how to explain, elaborate, give more information? I like the sound of these words and to me they conjure up an image. That's it. I see something but should it/can it be exactly the same for anyone else?    
 — stout

My apologies, but this is more a list of words, than a poem. The words only vaguely seem to go together. 4/10
 — Henry

My own opinion is that if they mean something only to the poet, they are best left where only the poet can enjoy them.  If a poet can't explain his poetry, perhaps it doesn't really have a meaning.  Just my opinion...
 — Isabelle5

true serendipity

tactful serf
thirsty sod
tadpole seeker
tautology scion
tireless soul

ts you are .
 — sir_I_clan

This could be extended into a fine poem. I think you have the bare skull and cross bones here
 — larrylark

Thank you all for commenting. Isabelle i can explain i don't want to. sir-I-clan you are a genius. Larry thank you for your words.
 — stout

I'm sorry that you don't want to explain but that's your choice.  Why would you post a poem that only you know the key to, though?  This is a place to get comments about the poem and if we can't even understand it, if most everyone who has commented has said it is not much but a list or the bones of a poem, what did you post it here for?  You can't be a better writer if you don't take the advice of readers.

I don't read TS Eliott.  I find him a little vacuus and vague most of the time.  
 — Isabelle5

I think lines 1 to 4 are a dream.
Lines 5 and 6 seem to imply that the slumbering voice in question
is tired of their room and "board" (the ship).
I think I might read this again, in order to better understand it, the way
I see fit; rather than demand that someone explain something because
I refuse to take the time to "figure it out".
Good work, poet. Don't be rattled by the rigid and obtuse who command
you to conform on behalf of the "reader". Be free.
 — unknown

Isabelle, thanks for taking the time to talk. I guess our opinions just differ. I do appreciate your and every one elses comments, and accept the criticisms. But in principal, I don't necessarily hold the key at all.
Unknown thank you for your kind words.
 — stout

Hi Stout

These words work so well together and conjure much fanciful imagery in my mind.


 — larrylark


it swings back and
forth with a light ripple
while a marble

tumbles down her to
find land
 — gnormal

Good poem.
Find land.
 — sir_I_clan

speek stoo-pid,
make fun-hi rit-ting!

brown coo?

miso soop.
 — geckodrome