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with wings not fit for flight
Celia

while you look at me
 1
with your Eyes
 2
(all chlorophyll
 3
and reproachful softness)
 4
 
 
with words floating:
 5
out and around
 6
 
 
all letters and sounds
 7
meaning;
 8
"you are bad
 9
at being a good child but,
 10
this does not affect my fondness of you."
 11
 
 
i want to get high
 12
and drink warm Brownie soup
 13
out of teacups
 14
 
 
and then, sink Away
 15
in that lovely, silly
 16
way i have
 17
of falling through space and time.
 18

15 Jun 08

Rated 10 (10) by 1 users.
Active (1):
Inactive (0): 10

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Comments:

cactus?
 — Celia

cocti? oh, that sounded funny...
cukk-tie, hmmm...
 — fractalcore

i would prefer constructive comments
to cactus-structive comments.
= ]
 — Celia

is this a poem for your father? nice move with that
semicolon after |11. maybe make your first strophe
the second to the last.

cukk-tie, hmm...
; )
 — fractalcore

theh remove ", and then" from |15?
yeah maybe, if it works for you.
: )
 — fractalcore

i meant ", i would".
sorry, a cactus stung me.
: )
 — fractalcore

no, its a poem for a friend.
well, a special friend, i guess you could say.
and thanks that definitly helps.
 — Celia

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