| that searing truth
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Aziel
| i would readily | 1 |
tattoo upon | 2 |
my sealed eyelids | 3 |
the truth of day, | 4 |
hoping for the needle to | 5 |
pierce | 6 |
my delicate, eager skin | 7 |
to allow | 8 |
some warm sunlight | 9 |
to peer through | 10 |
| 20 Jun 08 |
Rated 9.2 (9.2) by 7 users.
Active (7): 8, 9, 10, 10 Inactive (1): 1, 9, 9, 10 (define the words in this poem)
(38 more poems by this author)
(2 users consider this poem a favorite)
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Comments:
very interesting i really enjoyed it — unknown
This is good Aziel--very strong mtaphorically. The only thing I would change is "so" in line 8. I don't think it's needed. — PaulS
nice image... is it yours totally? it's worked well: the wording as an object allows just enough light to come through the edges of the phrases. — joey
I sear my steak,
seal in the juice.
I wish this train,
had a sexy calaboose. — unknown
Paul--
changed it, it was unnecessary.
Joey--
Yes, totally mine.
Unknown--
GOD DAMMIT I WANT STEAK NOW. — Aziel
oh wow, so you're the one who wrote this?
write on, poet.
: ) — fractalcore
Not too shabby, kiddo.
But your eyes should be wary of needles, because you never know which carry ink and which carry thread. — Cerulise
tat's another one you've embedded in our quivering skin -- we get the point -- they make pinhole glasses for viewing the screen and makes things clear again -- this is a little crystal reflecting the light from inside out without a doubt -- nice write Aziel — AphroDite
i really like this depth. Its a beautiful metaphor poem. good word choices. — silentspring
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