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The horrific epiphany
Porcelain_Lo

A life of lies
 1
Of I love you's
 2
that prove false
 3
and smiling faces
 4
staring only at the features.
 5
 
 
Am I lovely to you?
 6
Wait till you see the inside.
 7
Everyone believes in me
 8
Till they know what I hide.
 9
 
 
A moment of truth
 10
You best close your eyes
 11
I'm not looking for forever
 12
Just a night with a man
 13
who sees me for who I am.
 14
 
 
Do you want to be with me?
 15
Better check your intentions
 16
I'm not cute nor innocent
 17
when you find all my dimensions.
 18
 
 
Everything proves false
 19
You will find this true
 20
when you stare directly at me
 21
and see more than eyes
 22
I belong to the world.
 23
 
 
Are you ready for disappointment?
 24
Because that's what I convey
 25
It doesn't matter if you believe you care
 26
I can see more than what you say.
 27

5 Aug 08

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I'm sure you're a great person, just a bit self absorbed, makes a big empty space inside of you, and you're afraid to show them you're just a boring old hag. well tell me, who isn't just a boring old hag underneath the lashes. you've got to decorate your boring old hag with pinwheels and birds, and then people will even love your inner boring old hag.
 — OKcomputer

Thoughts:  The line start capitals don't aid this poem; too, the scheme is not consistent, some lines starting with smallcase.
These poems that make the poor reader the subject are tough to put over.
I am not interested in the speaker's spiel; she has done nothing to make me interested in her.  "Do you want to be with me?".  No, why would I?
See, these accusatory-type works just shove the readers away, saying "nahhh, not for me."  That's the case here.  Thought: disengage from your private self and write instead of things that your readers might find engaging or provocative or delicately amusing, etc.  Kind regards for you, but not for this poem.  
 — netskyIam

Are you ready for disappointment?
24
Because that's what a convey
25

PS: new poems deserve careful proof reading by their maker.
When I post a poem, it has been composed here in post,
then I go over and over and over the thing to eradicate the typos that
I, myself, always make too.  You are not alone in error.
 — netskyIam

i think this is amazing... i guess feeling insignificant makes us self absorbed. ah well heres to selfish people like you and me! ;)
 — brokenarrows

If we led subsistence lives, had to harrow fields and haul water up from wells and feed sickly children and render hogs and....well, such poems as this were not written in the olden days.  Readers would react pretty negatively: "oh poor little you, go curl up and dry out."
 — netskyIam

Thank you all for your feedback. I know, netskyIam, I didn't proofread this one much... just posted it and left it alone because it was a little bit of a bad situation. [if that makes any sense to anyone else]. Thanks to everyone.
 — Porcelain_Lo

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