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Smashed
unknown

My life was like a flawless,
 1
shimmering glass
 2
 
 
representation of hope. And then
 3
it fell to the cracked ground,
 4
shards of my true self
 5
becoming red diamonds as they
 6
 
 
exploded onto my flesh.
 7
I had always been a bug
 8
crushed beneath a mechanical anvil,
 9
fake and metallic,
 10
 
 
now exposed, this emotionless
 11
thrashing lab that they
 12
stabbed me upon over the years,
 13
their goal to take whatever
 14
they could steel—
 15
 
 
genuine insignificant blood began to
 16
squeeze through the crevices
 17
of my bitter and supposed
 18
paranoid understanding;
 19
trying to conform to this new mold
 20
but unable to, effort meaningless,
 21
my own insistence to justice
 22
just strapped and unmovable—
 23
 
 
I wasn't ready
 24
the day they told me
 25
I wasn't real,
 26
 
 
a digital bag of nothing
 27
except for hardwired decisions—
 28
 
 
a computer, now worthless and
 29
crashed.
 30

10 Apr 09

Rated 10 (10) by 4 users.
Active (4): 9
Inactive (0): 10, 10, 10

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(2 users consider this poem a favorite)



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Comments:

I see the circuitous way you've blended this into the crashed fragments left of you as you do in the last strophe making it plain that your virtual reality has had a fatality -- nevertheless listen to this as you speak it along in a song with internal sonics 'n ironics moved by your story-teller pen again 'n again and then write it as you sing it

nice to see you back listen

Music begins to atrophy when it departs too far from the dance... poetry begins to atrophy when it gets too far from music. -- Ezra Pound
 — AlchemiA

thanks AlchemiA. it's good to know you're still around.
 — listen

your insight is good
and you also are
good because you wrote
a good poem.
 — unknown

nice.

: )
 — fractalcore

this is really good-
I especially like lines 5-7
nICE lee dunn
 — JKWeb

thanks everyone, for reading this. always appreciated.
 — listen

Another good one, listen.  You have a knack of blending in subtle metaphors to what could be taken as literal--if you know what I mean.  You're voice is unique--the mark of a good writer.
 — PaulS

thanks Paul.
 — listen

for picking up on that, as well. it is true indeed, and i do know what you meant by that. good to know it works.
 — listen

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