poetry critical

online poetry workshop



some POE tree add vice in alchemic fractal language
JKWeb

bee gin by trEYEing to visualEYES
 1
wut U wunt to (w)rite
 2
 
 
 
 
use ellip.........sis spare ing lee...
 3
 
 
 
 
don't go over bored with alliter 8 shuns, i.e.
 4
 
 
bearded bakers baked bread benevolently
 5
for cranky customers too concerned to call
 6
delicious danish desserts delicious............
 7
 
 
 
 
use the word SOUL care FULL ee..
 8
 
 
IN stead, U could use the werds:
 9
 
 
Specter, Spirit or Sole..
 10
 
 
 
 
learn your   l                s
 11
                   i             k
 12
                    n         a
 13
                      e     e
 14
                        b r
 15
 
 
 
 
bee care FULL wiff ty POES and spell eeng...
 16
 
 
 
 
when writing po8try for your sole mate,
 17
     use cau shun with compliments:
 18
 
 
GOOD: Your reflection emits radiance.
 19
 
 
BAD: Your reflection could break mirrors.
 20
 
 
 
 
but most of all, (w)rite from your heART..
 21
 
 
not that I'm an X pert...
 22

19 Sep 09

Rated 10 (8) by 2 users.
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Comments:

tHanks for the Knod -- sumTimes it's gOod to manGle the wOrds to let the Light out
 — AlchemiA

crap
 — unknown

    I am guilty, your honor....
 — ambiguos

    I am guilty, your honor.
 — ambiguos

I thought it was very creative....but...I guess I just dont see the link to Poe. Did I blink and miss it???
 — Nashoba

AlchemiA-
was hoping you'd catch this one..
thanks
 — JKWeb

unknown-
take care of your bowels
 — JKWeb

ambiguos-
thanks for reading and comment
 — JKWeb

Nashoba-
no link to Poe..
just a play on words is all
thanks for reading..
 — JKWeb

i like the creativity that went into this-nice work.
 — unknown

this is a good cover on that last crap that ginsberg did -- what did he call it, 'cosmetological blues' or something? but, what you haven't done is caught frac or alc's voices and that's the only point in the title's refinement of your own skills towards those of your betters. for instance, alc and frac both write two poems at once, using a pencil in each hand -- this is documented -- and without that skill level i can't think that you'll address these writers beyond more than 'left-brain, right-brain', when in fact they're involved in in-brain, out-brain, and brain-ola of the top brain and bottom brain. that dimensionality is awesome, of course, and the NV of lesser sci-fi poets like myself and mong. had it in you to go to school for several decades and learn tante amilie yoga from the tantmud scholars you'd have a noton, and your own work would become powerful enough to parody what's his name... 'lark'.
 — trashpoodle

ignore poodle
best way.
 — unknown

t-poodle-
thanks for reading
I wasn't trying to catch their voices
just the way they write, their unique stylzzz
the cool way thay write certain words, that's all
AlchemiA is okay with it...hopefully, frac will have a l@@k
...
 — JKWeb

* they
 — JKWeb

unknown-
score models.
breast way.
 — JKWeb

actually, the point i was trying to say is that our voice in poetry is the way our writing looks, and not what we talk about or, in this case, whom we're talking about. so, here, you've caught ginsberg's banality, when actually neither frac nor alc are banal. that's the point -- that a poem is a style first and a plot after -- and, the plot of a poem is always the story of someone writing a poem.

alc writes in several styles and is always experimenting and frac writes only in the most honest way he can find to write. ginsberg wrote to sound like 'ginsberg'.
 — trashpoodle

t-poodle-
fair enough..
not terribly familiar with Ginsburg but he seems to be a prominent figure in poetry so I'll take the "banal" comment and run with it...
I like Alch's and Fract's styles is all..
 — JKWeb

to the unknown
who liked the "creativity"
thank you
glad you like it...
 — JKWeb

but, you've read 'cosmopolitan greetings' haven't you? the style and form  is right out of those last works of his.

the horror.
 — trashpoodle

ignore poodle.
best way.
 — unknown

poodle triumphs Alc and Frat a lot, but any can write like them, they have a style is all. nothing else.
what poodle mistakes for creative art, is just style, nothing special, which is another mistake he makes, poetry isn't gimmicks.
though he will say Alc and Fract are true poets because he sucks up to them maightily, as they and him are the only members of his shitty little site.
 — unknown

t-poodle-
like I said, a lot of folks seem to like Ginsburg
so I'll take it...
if you don't like it, that's okay-
you're entitled to your opinion..
 — JKWeb

unknown-
we'll have to agree to disagree as far as Alch and frac's talent level..
"jellyfish back strophe" and "kinhin for the kindred" are both excellent..
=our opinions are part of what makes us individuals=
 — JKWeb

in this case, about poetry, it's not about 'opinion' -- like, when you drink sour milk is it your 'opinion' which is getting in the way of you're not having a good 'milk'? get real: poetry is talent and craft, and you find it by being honest about your feelings and turn them into emotions. who told you that poetry was this thing you could just write without caring how it was written? and, why are you arguing like a mother in a critical poetry space, defending your 'precious'? this is where you can talk about poetry and how it gets written. and, ginsberg -- why should i care if 'people' like the guy who worked so hard to take the words out of poetry so that his stuff wouldn't look like crap next to gary snyder's?
 — trashpoodle

poodles opinion of what is "good poetry" is suspicious, and subjective. he likes gimmicky poetry, obviously, and not real poetry.
it is always best to ignore poodles opinions.
best way.
 — unknown

no one cares about what you care or dont care about, poodle.
understand?
 — unknown

unk -> Ecce nunc patiemur philosophantem nobis asinum?
 — unknown

well, the answer is no, obviously.
 — unknown

what i like is poetry which reflects emotion as expressed and mind which is in the thrall of emotion -- not 'having a thought' or 'working out a puzzle'. poetry which works for me seems to be only using words which can be used by the poet at that time. it's not 'ironic' or 'propaganda' writing.

it really doesn't matter what you guys are looking for in poetry or why, as long as you're not faking here and just posting some mindless crap you typed out. the problem is that it's so easy to type words into a 'poem pattern' and so hard to write poetry --

it's fine that you're subjective and like what you like -- or, in the case of the bad unknown, simply like anyone who has a problem with me -- but it's not honest poetry or critique.
 — trashpoodle

you like gimmicks in poetry, and for people to agree with you.
you have nothing of any value, or interest, worth the notice.
 — unknown

im sure if poodle
stopped being such
a cunt, he wouldn't
have so many problems
here.
 — unknown

thanks all-
for visiting again and latin phrases ;)



and thanks EpicPants for favoring-
much gratitude...
 — JKWeb

* phrase
 — JKWeb

oh hi, JKWeb. how you doin?

seems this post has kindled some strong emotions from
people with varying perspectives. i'm very flattered by
this gesture of yours. i really appreciate it and i'm sorry
that our names -- Alc and mine [and mike] -- create so
much fuss here. i'm sure you understand what kind of
ground you're treading on as i know you've been here
quite awhile so... yeah, sorry for all the trouble.

i think what i like most about artists -- or people in general --
is when they're being themselves in whatever they do. i'm
always prone to think[ing] that of anyone here anyway, but it's
a struggle for most of us, yes? it's when one finds his voice that
one really gets his soul exposed in expression. that's why Alc
can only be Alc, as JKWeb can only be JKWeb, as mike can only
be mike, as syrossoul can only be syrossoul, as unknown can
only be unknown in poetry, prose, or painting, or sculpture and
whatnot.

in terms of your emulation of certain styles, however, you're very
close. on that note, therefore, please know that i can only run short
in my attempt to emulate you or anyone here, if i ever desire to do
so now or in the future, and it will ba a worthwhile learning experience
for me. i learn from you, from Alc, from mike, and even form our
very dear unknown. it's really important for us, though, to pick up
on the very precious pointers anybody dishes out for us here -- just
as a reminder, of course, and an, sort of, antithesis to the 'ignore...'
memorandum.

thank you very much for appreciating our very own futile attempts at
poetry and sorry for my late visit.

: )
 — fractalcore

fractalcore-
glad you were finally able to have a l@@k--
thanks for reading and favoring
your comments: very well said and very much appreciated...
gratitude...
 — JKWeb

This poem is really creative! I like the play on words with soul and sole. My favorite part is the shape of "line break."

Playful and fun! Not too serious but has some great tips for poetry!!
 — unknown

unknown-
thanks for reading and commenting..
I did try to make this fun and I'm glad you got that...
I appreciate it..
 — JKWeb

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