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anatomy of a smile
nemissk8

for brenna

     her hair:
 1
curly locks spill with irish browns
 2
carrying coiled glimmers of light
 3
over a mosaic of toasted freckles.
 4
 
 
     her eyes:
 5
blue and green mandalas
 6
copulate to weave the iris of her eyes
 7
and seduce me with sacred geometry.
 8
 
 
     her smile:
 9
a dimple surrenders beneath delicate lips
 10
that reach with youthful ambition
 11
to color her face with a smile.
 12
 
 
     her:
 13
she is beautiful.
 14

27 Nov 09

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Comments:

lovely!! thank you. Les Cloke
 — unknown

thanks for the read/compliment
 — unknown

ah yes you're very welcome!! Les
 — unknown

nice one-
it's difficult to write this type of poem
without seeming cheesy-
but you've managed this very well..
magnifico!
 — JKWeb

much obliged JK
 — unknown

I agree with JK, you did it by overcoming cheesyness. It's quite elegant as well as simple, and I imagine it brought brenna a smile.
 — ashtray

thanks for the read. this type of poem always runs the risk of cheesyness and ive definitely fallen for that trap before
 — unknown

nice write
 — unknown

sweet. i especially like lines 5&6
 — unknown

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