poetry critical

online poetry workshop



smoke break at the work release facility
unknown

she uses me
 1
i know it
 2
she knows it too
 3
usually comes around
 4
when her latest boyfriend
 5
runs out of dope
 6
or kicks her out
 7
we got a daughter together
 8
guess that's what
 9
keeps her in my heart
 10
some stupid hope
 11
we'll both turn a corner
 12
and have something like
 13
little house on the prairie
 14
you know?
 15
he says
 16
lighting another
 17
cigarette.
 18

30 Mar 10

Rated 10 (10) by 2 users.
Active (2): 10
Inactive (0): 10

(define the words in this poem)

(1 user considers this poem a favorite)



Add A Comment:
Enter the following text to post as unknown: captcha

Comments:

Hmmmm...sounds like the smokebreaks here!  LOL!  Yep.  I feel it.  I may never know who you are, but I've always been a fan of those blue collar work poems that you (assuming it's been YOU) put out.  They're so relatable and true to the form.  Keep it up, brotha!
 — starr

LOVE IT!
 — mandolyn

Oh laura, where is our log . .. cabin?
 — unknown

Is this a guard talking to an inmate? If not, how does "she" come around? If it's an authority figure humanized for the narrator by his own struggles, it could be shown better without being announced and losing the tangental quality of the write.
 — NicMichaels

0.297s