poetry critical

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when the thorns of the
maythorn bush in
which i had jumped
from great height that
had torn hatchet wounds
in my face and feet for
i had discarded shoes
and socks
looked like goldsworthy
i knew

14 Apr 10

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 — psychofemale

nice poem.
 — hank

 — unknown

I knew what?
Tell me =
 — unknown

 — stout

What, you knew you were a shark?
Thats silly.
 — unknown

 — stout

why would knowing that one was a shark be silly? humph.
 — unknown

shut up V.
 — unknown

 — unknown

nice poem stout :)
your titles always amaze me.  wish i could poem streamline the way you do.  

once i dreamt i got stung by a bee because in real life i have never been stung, and i ran downstairs to tell my brother of my discovery saying 'paul, now i know what it's like to be stung by a bee!" and he replied, "so, what, if you dream you got bitten by a shark would you really know what it's like to be bitten by a shark?"

you had to bee there i guess.  sometimes i have these moments. :)
 — jenakajoffer

thanks. thats a good story and a jolly interesting proposition - my dreams are terrifying, so i'd rather have the real thing anyday. this thing with the bush happened and it was wonderful.
 — stout

there is a fine element of mystery to this poem because of the last line.  i like it.

i like the word 'jolly' used in a sentence. :)
 — jenakajoffer