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after pumping his gas...

he buys a box of condoms
so he can look into the assuming eyes of the gas station attendant
to feel for that one moment
like there really is
some Tracy or Elizabeth or Sandra

11 May 10

Rated 9 (9) by 2 users.
Active (2):
Inactive (2): 4, 9, 9, 10

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 — psychofemale

HA! This is awesome.
 — mandolyn

i'm not sure of the women's names, because they're all movie-star names, and that would make them goddesses to the gas station guy, and cognitively, we don't know if the attendant is a boy or girl, and so this maybe is about the gesture of buying condoms and writing that in public, in a poem... like, if it were in a food store and the author bought a box of 'power bars', would it make any difference in the banality of saying? -- to prove that you have a life, is to show someone your moves, and the loser part is very real. in a way, a poem is like that, showing the world that you know what you're supposed to do, even if you're frozen in place and can't.
 — bmikebauer

This is right up my (kate and) alley!  This snippet could easily be worked into a larger piece, if that's where it wants to go.  The last line with the women's names could be smoothed out a little... a 3 syllable name, then 2, then 1 with only one or before the last.

Very cleaver and current and hip!!
 — jpmhawk

Another egg and soldiers glimpse, methinks - bravo, wish I'd written it.
 — Abracadabra

Love it, Octo. Were you close to home...  heh!
 — unknown

lol jmp! haha, love the word play.
 — mandolyn

Err I mean jpm
 — mandolyn

have a good night?
 — unknown

Oh wow, never thought of that =]
 — Callisto