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silent song of the grey dove
OCTOGENARIAN

I am a bird in ice
 1
white frost dangles
 2
from what was once a blaze of blue
 3
that streaked along my back
 4
like summer lakes
 5
where children fed me
 6

8 Feb 11


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(124 more poems by this author)



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Comments:

I really like this. It is very delicate. I feel like it could be expanded - maybe think about what makes it a song? What makes it silent? What is the role of time? Just things to ponder.
 — Erowen

thanks so much for your comments
 — OCTOGENARIAN

dangles sounds rather peculiar. I like everything else, however. Your poem is simple, sweet and poignant. If I can think of a replacement for "dangles," I'll return. If not, I will leave you and your pretty writing alone.
 — unknown

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