poetry critical

online poetry workshop



The Thìnkìng Man’s Reçìpé
JKWeb

ƒorehead,
 1
quick ìncision
 2
blood triçkles to brow
 3
 
 
dìg ƒingers
 4
to smooth surface
 5
tug,
 6
pull back sçalp
 7
 
 
çhip skull with ìce pick
 8
saw Çlorox crown
 9
 
 
expose jellyfìsh matter
 10
to damp
 11
bacterìa
 12
aìr
 13
 
 
tip head towards pot
 14
empty çontents inside
 15
boìl on hìgh ƒour minutes
 16
add ketchup
 17
enjoy
 18

9 Nov 11

Rated 10 (8.3) by 1 users.
Active (1): 10, 10
Inactive (2): 5

(define the words in this poem)
(172 more poems by this author)

(1 user considers this poem a favorite)



Add A Comment:
Enter the following text to post as unknown: captcha

Comments:

Gee whiz Webster, you got my goosebumps going on. You know i dig ya,
and this is your style. But I want to see what else you got in that hat holder of
yours. i want to see you stretch your creative muscles. O,O oh yaah
.by the way, whats with the willy nilly lettering. I like it.
 — unknown

hello unknown,
  thanks for reading and nice comments.   I see what you're getting at and promise to post a less gruesome one next time 'round.

Ğłąď Ÿōō ĺįĸę Ŧhë ƒσŋŧś
 — JKWeb

Web, are you a cereal killer?
 — ghost

boo ghost,
  yes, I like Cinnamon Toast Crunch and Cocoa Puffs.  What's your favorite serial?
 — JKWeb

sakes alive, that's a buttload of spam!
 — JKWeb

hannibal has risen!
:p
 — fractalcore

What a change of style. More Starr than Web
 — unknown

thanks fractalman for reading/feedback.

"Well, Clarice - have the lambs stopped screaming?"
 — JKWeb

gracias unknown for the Starr comparison/compliment.  just a slight change of pace.
 — JKWeb

Gruesomely delectable.  Everything's better with ketchup on it  ;)
 — sybarite

you're rite sybaright.  ketchup is bloody good.  thanks for lookin'.
 — JKWeb

i found the poem neither gruesome, nor interesting.
reads more like a set of instructions tha a recipe.
sure, recipes might include 'how to remove _______ from its husk/shell/casing/whatever', but generally a recipe will more likely involve ingredient lists and texture hints, time allowances, heat measurements. i see that only in three lines of the entire piece, 15-17.

it's a pretty simplistic poem, with very little in the way of detail to add interest, for me. the odd "f" and the accented "c" are a mystery, to me. i must be missing some insider joke as to the poetic purpose of employing them. am i to find some connection bewtween forehead, fingers, four? is there some scheme behind trickles, Clorox, contents? not every "f" is shaped this way, nor every "c" accented; is this a puzzle-poem, and that's why it offers no emotional value to me, because it's only a game?
 — unknown

you're right unknown.  what would I do without your brilliant critique?  I want to be just like you when I grow up.
 — JKWeb

it's a terrible thing to have your masterpiece questioned, challenged?
grow the fuck up.
nobody ever improved at anything when all they ever received was praise.
don't believe the hype from the ass-kissers.
a good start would be to explain the twice-asked question of the import of the fancy "f"s and accented "c"s, else your lack of substance be further exposed.
 — unknown

unknown,
I don't mind proper critique.  as a matter of fact, I welcome it.  unfortunately, you offer nothing of substance/nothing that's going to make me "improve" as you put it.  all you do is split hairs.  anyone can crit like that but it makes you look pompous and dopey.  
 — JKWeb

first, why don't you enlighten me as to what constitutes "proper critique"? maybe YOU can help ME to improve.
secondly, nothing of substance? ugh.

"generally a recipe will more likely involve ingredient lists and texture hints, time allowances, heat measurements. i see that only in three lines of the entire piece, 15-17."

cripes.  
 — unknown

also, i notice that 'substance' is significantly lacking from the positive reviews. is 'substance' only required when the rating/review is less than favourable?
 — unknown

unknown-
God knows I'm not an expert on critique
but I know it when I see it.  I received a lot of helpful and insightful critique on 'Stalingrad' for instance.  In answer to your question, the fonts have no significant meaning (my attempt at adding some flair is all).  Also, as you well know, some recipe's are short and sweet.  I suppose I could have expanded on the idea and may do so in the future.  On second thought, maybe not.  Looks like someone beat me to it on "thinking man's last resort"--was it you?
 — JKWeb

ralph lauren outlet
pandora jewelry
christian louboutin
canada goose outlet
pandora charms
cristiano ronaldo jerseys
burberry outlet canada
canada goose outlet
adidas nmd
florida marlins jerseys
michael kors
pandora jewelry
nike store
moncler jackets
nike free 4.0
christian louboutin outlet
uggs canada
nike air max shoes
ugg australia
adidas yeezy boost
moncler jackets
kate spade outlet
louboutin shoes
nike air max 87
kate spade bags
timberland boots
ralph lauren outlet
moncler outlet
coach outlet
christian louboutin outlet
coach canada outlet
ultra boost
ugg boots
swarovski outlet
coach factory outlet
pg 2
cheap jordans
ray ban sunglasses
longchamp outlet
nike air max zero
uggs outlet store
canada goose outlet
adidas
cheap oakley sunglasses
supra shoes
canada goose jackets
louboutin shoes
nike shoes for men
kate spade handbags
coach outlet online
oakley sunglasses
pandora jewelry
coach factory outlet
pittsburgh pirates jerseys
adidas shoes
mulberry outlet
ray ban sunglasses
uggs outlet
polo outlet
prada handbags
coach outlet store
ugg outlet
coach outlet
uggs outlet
coach factory outlet online
jordans
moncler outlet
coach outlet online
coach outlet
adidas nmd shoes
moncler outlet online
nike shoes
adidas stan smith
air jordan shoes
kate spade outlet store
cheap mlb jerseys
coach handbags
moncler outlet
ralph lauren sale clearance
adidas shoes
louis vuitton outlet online
adidas shoes
supreme clothing
coach factory outlet
converse all star
coach factory outlet
michael kors outlet clearance
nike air presto
canada goose jackets
uggs outlet store
replica watches
kate spade outlet
pandora charms sale
ralph lauren uk
birkenstock outlet
jordan shoes
181018yueqin
 — unknown

0.382s