poetry critical

online poetry workshop

night meeting

Eastern walled pleasure Garden
shadowless, jaggered leaves
enlivened by nightly frosts.
Protruding radial wind wheels,
intermittendly side stepped,
tacitly dissevered our tryst

1 Mar 12

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Cassell i like your style. Short and too the point. Sometimes  though i feel your diction is like a dictionary sweep
 — unknown

maybe a comma after 'stepped'...?

formula poem but nice sounds -- a klezmer band behind the bushes, tootling cole porter; and, in the far sky, the Twins ascending over Mirror, the land of many faces.
 — cadmium