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The Tired Side of Me

lucid thoughts of suicide
As I sit here and divulge
my mind often escapes me
when its beaten to the ground
Boxed up like a hamster
in this dim-lit heated room
The walls keep coming closer
adding to my gloom
And just on the other side
of these thin white walls
I here loud panicked shouting
Coming from the all
In their maddened craze,
they continue to not stop
expanding on my troubled lows
They keep the need a lot
As I try to drown them out
I close my eyes and plug my ears
but still their desperate cries for help
are all I fucking hear
So even though I abstain from helping
My brain still processes their needs
and from what I can tell
There is nothing I can do
So in turn, I no longer try to try
I grasp a piece of jagged metal
and insert it into a thin sheeted lock
I turn my makeshift key
to unlock the pale door
All I see is a ferocious burst of red
All I hear is a silence as sharp as space
The lights all went to black
I, remain, frozen, but relaxed
I no longer hear them speak
Or feel pressured and alone
lonely but not dying, I let the forces take me
So I drift away with haste
In my novel state of peace

12 Jun 15

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Call your doctor. Your mess need an adjustment.

As for your poem, you sound like a teenage girl, and this poem is about as sappy as it can get.

If you're gonna go for sap and cliche, at least make it interesting. If you don't wanna listen to other people's pain, I have no idea why you think people would want to read your poetry. Selfish much?
 — unknown

lol, i like you, and the way you see things, and yeah, selfish, hypocritical, all of the above, i mean aren't we all that, and self conscious and/or scared, your unknown, so i couldn't say you were selfish for attention, but you were for stimulation.

A person who helps and helps and is always there to listen, always, should eventually lose there minds after a while its just not the human way.
We must be selfish and be the ones who shout, and most are, so to the ones who dont and just listen, it tires them, eats them up inside, to hear everyone's selfish bullshit, and that act of suicide is the one and only selfish act, he decides to take...

or something like that..
 — kripto


You said nothing about your poem. I mean no offense, but this is the most trivial poem I've read here on PC in quite some time.
 — unknown

And to answer your question above, no, we are not all selfish, self conscious and scared, but those that indulge heavily in those things tend to see them in others. It's called projection. Read up on it, it might help your writing. Unlikely though.
 — unknown

lol, i know much about projection, and reflection, you might not now much about the former, i know much about the human concept, and if you studied psychology you too would be quite skeptical or pessimistic when thinking of general intention and self being. We are all messes in our own way, i just wrote of a specific kind of mess, lol, yes they can be found in teen age dramatic girls but those are not the ones that hurt from it. for from it, and you choose to stay anonymous which is fine, but it too reveals traits of yours, but at the end of the day, every single person thinks there right, but ironically doubts there selves at night.... also, every thing I said was about my poem... lol, btw, I'm not taking you serious, which is probably why I like you so much...
 — kripto

oh, and also, everything i do is always still rough draft, always, may re-write this entire poem, but the core will remain though, lol, i cant stress the lol enough, like im so apathetic but empathetic at the same time, idekocaa, and its cheesiness, or trivial as you love to call it, is the point, the suicide statistics of this country is too huge and when it comes to depression, well thats at 100%, cycles of depression is just a part of life, i to extent was mocking they way people deal and expressing a want to not be a part of it...
i think...
 — kripto