poetry critical

online poetry workshop

i write better when there's water bubbling in my eyes

i wanted to hear your voice before
the brush burned down but
the rain washed everything away and
now i'm left with a heap of aching bones and
scratches on my skin where you never touched

6 Mar 16

(define the words in this poem)
(152 more poems by this author)

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I like 4-5 a lot. Maybe introduce before L3 the idea of a controlled/uncontrolled fire, like the Parks department does.  
 — sixtywatt

I also really like 4 &5
 — dberlinn