poetry critical

online poetry workshop


I thought
"I should write"
Followed by my own
critic, he says
my father wouldn't like it or
you should make your best friend cry
like you do
every single time you think
you've ruined everything you ever had
just look
at your arm
at your loves
at your cars
at your wallet
at your brain
at your home
just look
at your past
at your present
at your future
just look
at your reality
just look
and tell everyone you're sorry
tell everyone you're not going to cry
and pretend like a social platform for sincerity is networking with an open mic and if you don't want to hear it you know what to do
because sooner or later
everyone else will catch up
and wonder how you got here first,
Other people maybe they write but they don't
Maybe other people they feel but they don't
Other people maybe they sympathize but they don't
Maybe other people talk but they don't
I go to write and I think of old words and I think
"I can do better"
Or how this moment is mine,
but I wish other people would read more and type more and spread ideas and challenge themselves and look death in the eye and dissect it's mind and stop pretending they aren't as red-handed as me fucking just paint with it because we have to leave something real for others to find instead of just watching to see other people embarrass themselves in the name of intellectual honesty: I want to live the way I want to live and posting rambling rants and poetry on Facebook isn't just writing: it's graffiti. There are no rules there is only blank space.
I'm just waiting for you
to make your mark over mine
so we can share
an experience
that we make
out of literal-fucking-ly the fuck nothing
except the fuck we give
and I think we should write
we should all be writing
a story or something greater

10 Mar 16

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kind of fans out but not like a flood in a flood plain, the kind that carries boulders and trees and slams them into honda civics. it kind of trickles out, and maybe people too busy to read a book will like this because it says stuff but doesn't say too much.

you know, we're coming already from a literate centered culture, and we upped that into literature as truth, and not literature as fantasy or escape. so, when kurt b., a pretty good poet once, first met me and wanted me to like his stuff because he though i was tolerable as a writer, he said to me, "you should apologize for being so old". and, i said to him the same thing back, but about being a kid. after a point i had to recognize that talent wasn't enough, that kurt was pretty nowhere, very unable to do anything but write in skarter vokabulary, and couldn't really visualize or structure anything that didn't give immediate gratification. now, kurt's a nice guy and decent and all, but so what. and, i think we don't have to do this kind of apology you're doing, looking in the mirror and trying to see yourself as others see you, because finding your reality in your writing and for building your own identity is going to just knock these whiny "write so i can read it" kind of people out of the way and in front of a bus.

not that there aren't some nice leaf clusters and sticky things in this tree.
 — cadmium