poetry critical

online poetry workshop



The Message
unknown

Today would've been the day
 1
when I telephoned at sunrise
 2
to wish you Happy Father's Day.
 3
 
 
Instead, I beheld
 4
the blushing, boundless sky
 5
to relay my greeting
 6
by thought and spirit,
 7
hoping a winged messenger
 8
would deliver it to you.
 9
 
 
Instead, I visited
 10
Hallmark to select the card
 11
with message etched in gold,
 12
the card that won't be sent.
 13
 
 
Instead, I listened
 14
to your voicemail message,
 15
the last one that you voiced
 16
before your transition.
 17
 
 
Today is the day
 18
when silent moments sting.
 19

11 Jun 18

Rated 7.5 (7.5) by 2 users.
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(define the words in this poem)



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Comments:

Poignant!
 — unknown

Thank you.
 — unknown

very telling and poignant
 — Rossant

Thank you for commenting, Rossant.
 — unknown

Si vous utilisez des sons nasaux quand vous parlez, vous ne serez pas le bienvenu, parce que votre voix portant une replique montre sonne comme si vous vous plaigniez, sans vie et très négative. Si vous pensez que votre langue sera plus glamour, arrêtez d'utiliser des sons nasaux à partir de maintenant. Trop de volume peut être offensant, donnant aux gens l'impression de faire semblant. Mais le volume est trop petit, ce qui fait que les gens se sentent mal et se trompent. Généralement, il est nécessaire de contrôler de manière appropriée le volume du sujet en fonction de la distance de l'auditeur, de préférence dans les limites audibles de l'autre partie. La montre Audemars Piguet est à couronne vissée et est étanche à 50 mètres.
 — unknown

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 — yaoxuemei

cai123 08.16
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cai123 08.16
 — unknown

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